Last night I threw down the gauntlet while spending quality time (i.e. drinking) with two good friends of mine. These fine gentlemen are movie nerds with shockingly vast and encyclopedic mental databases when it comes to movies. Needless to say, they were less than impressed with my viewpoint. As Rory began making a case, Brad simply stood, went to his DVD case, removed Aliens, handed to me, and whispered, "The defense rests." (Note: this did not actually happen, but it's a good way to sum up that three hour argument). I don't disagree with them. Aliens was a great movie. But it didn't say anything. Aside from excellent action scenes and a distaste for giant Blackwater-like corporations, it was really Die Hard starring a woman on a spaceship. If only the agents Johnson would have listened, then their helicopter wouldn't be exploding right now!
For anyone who has seen Starship Troopers, it might seem ridiculous that I'm stating Paul Verhoeven has any idea how to paint with anything but a six-mile-wide paintbrush (especially the "Do Your Part" segment with the kids stepping on cockroaches - good God, I actually left the theater feeling sorry for the roaches). It almost seems subtlety is beyond his film making abilities. That's why he's a genius. He seems to be slapping you in the face with a construction crane screaming, "Look how bad the bad guys are and how good the good guys are!" And he is. But you have to peel back the layers and look at the foundation upon which the entire film is sitting. Yes, there's a bad guy doing bad things. But why? Why is their society so mired in crime and violence? How far is their world from ours in the spinning multiverse?
That's what makes the Holy Trinity so breathtaking. In each, a dystopian quasi-fascist (and completely fascist, in Starship Troopers) government sits atop a society roiling with unrest and social disturbance. In RoboCop, old Detroit (which probably now wishes someone had come in, bulldozed, and built a weird Epcot-looking city in its place) seethes under the guns of drug-fueled criminal gangs. The police have been privatized, and a giant corporation almost seems to be trying to make things worse. In Total Recall, the world seems calm, but notice the full body scanners for anyone getting on any public conveyance. And we later learn that rebels on Mars are constantly interfering with the government's attempts to mine a precious mineral (if only the rebels had been blue and in 3-D, I guess). And then we come to Starship Troopers, the crown jewel in the treasury. The book of the same name (considered by 99.99999% of people to be better than the movie, which makes no sense to me - the book is good, but did you watch the movie, man?) paints the picture of a thriving, functioning fascist society that has achieved peace and happiness yet still allows for peaceful dissent (Rico's parents aren't super-happy with the government, but never end up in a gaol). Paul Verhoeven, who has a certain perspective on fascism after being treated to a Fascism Beginners Course by some very motivated German teachers, decided to go the other direction. Instead of painting the fascist society as totally cool with dissenters, we are given that appearance, but then 180-ed when we see the fate of "Port Joe Smith."
If you're not really watching for it, it almost seems to just be a way to show the audience that bugs are bad. But we got that in the opening sequence, when Rico's unit is basically wiped out. So after the movie then flashes back to before the war even starts, we get an official government "news" feed that mentions how, quote "Mormon extremists" disregarded Federal warnings and established Port Joe Smith deep inside the Arachnid Quarantine Zone. We then see that the arachnids (the bad bugs of the movie) have wiped out all life there. Well, that was sure silly of them Mormons. Or was it? Let's say you're a fascist government who is tired of a group of people who won't worship at the alter of the Federation. So finally this group says, "Look, it's not really working out. It's not you, it's us. Why don't we just go and establish our own planet somewhere so we're not bothering you." I imagine it took a second and a half for someone to say, "Hell yes, that sounds great. We know just the planet." I mean, you can't have them leave, start their own planet and thrive. That would only encourage others to do the same, and then you have a fractioned human existence in the galaxy, and eventually a group of rivals who might decide to get froggy and jump, militarily speaking. But if they go to a planet where some bugs show up and wipe them out, you can point to the bodies and say (on the Federal computer network), "This is a tragedy. We tried to warn these religious weirdos. Sure hope no one does this again for a long, long time. Now back to a televised execution!"
So we have three universes in which to play. In RoboCop, a good man becomes a soulless killing machine, and we cheer as he cuts a swath through Detroit's crime waves. But his old partner wants him to remember who he was and embrace his humanity. As he does, he finds himself on the wrong side of his corporate masters and they attempt to destroy him, even employing the cop-killer gang who originally killed Murphy, making him in the cybernetic hero he is. Of course, the evil gang has been working with Omni Consumer Products's President, Dick Jones, the whole time. Privatization of government services wound around lawlessness, governmental neglect, a criminal culture, and a dude who totally explodes after being doused with toxic waste and hit by a speeding van.
Total Recall gives us a similar tale. A man named Quaid (wh0 in all actuality is probably having a coma dream) who's tired of his boring job, boring life, and (apparently) having sex with his smoking-hot wife, suddenly finds out he's a super spy and he alone can bring down the evil government that's oppressing the settlers on Mars. And because he turns against his one-time masters, they come down upon him with great vengeance and furious anger, sending in the greatest killing machine of modern time - Michael Ironside. Quaid must ally himself with the unwanted dregs of society so that he can bring peace and freedom to all by giving air to the people instead of letting the government control it. ...I guess. That's the point, right? I was distracted by the woman with three breasts.
And finally we get to Starship Troopers. As any of my friends who have watched this with me will tell you, I can go scene-by-scene and point out the cascading levels of awesome that is this movie. The strangest part is how much it pre-guess would happen in our second war in Iraq (I'm not making this political - I'm not saying one way or the other whether that war is a good thing. I'm just pointing out some similarities. Go with me on this). First, there is a big "terror" strike on a Federation city. Innocent civilians are dead and the government immediately mobilizes for war. So the humans decide to make a massive strike on Klendathu, the insects' home world. Okay, great, but they didn't seem to do much in the way of long-term planning or recon work. So the troops land (with their embedded reporter) and they discover they may not have done all the math necessary. Realizing he messed up big, the military's leader, Sky Marshall Dienes (Rumsfeld), resigns. Which kinda happened... eventually. So the new Sky Marshall devises her battle plan to fight the bugs, which is a longer-term plan involving more troops and actual, you know, strategy. And even though this movie clearly finds fault with the Federation government and its methods, you never get the feeling there is anything but respect for the actual men and women doing the fighting. Some fight well, some are terrible, some run scared. But it's clear they're in a shitty situation the average person can only imagine, and they're doing their best.
Oh, and somehow Doogie Howser becomes an SS Colonel, and it doesn't seem strange. Damn, this movie is crazy.
Some people may think I'm selling the writers of these films short. After all, without the written word, there is nothing upon which to build. And that's true. I'm a screenwriter, too. I know they should get paid tons of cash for their sweet screenplays, especially hilarious pirate-themed movies. (See the movie poster to the left. Note: that movie hasn't actually been made... yet). But in this case, we cannot give the credit to the screenwriters. It just can't be done. Sequels have been made, and they were terrible. (I gotta be honest here. I was certain there was a Total Recall 2 that was made as a made-for-TV movie. But when I put "Total Recall 2" into imdb.com, it took me to the page for Minority Report. So I'm counting that as the sequel, and it wasn't very good. But I'm still pretty sure about Total Recall 2). Ed Neumeier, the man responsible for Starship Troopers and RoboCop, is a good writer, but only (apparently) when Paul Verhoeven is steering the ship. I'm not trying to say he's not a good writer. I actually liked Anacondas: Hunt for the Blood Orchid (the sequel to the J-Lo, Jon Voight tour-de-force). Its directing and acting may leave something to be desired, but from a story standpoint, if you're asked to write a movie that explains how snakes are getting to be giant and fight-y, it's well done. The point is that Paul Verhoeven makes any script 150% better and makes movies that make the world happy.
[Defense Attorney: Your Honor, objection! What about Showgirls?
Daryl: I've never heard of such a film.
Judge: Me either. Objection overruled. ]
I have to stop writing now, or I will go on forever about how Paul Verhoeven's worldview, artistic visions, and force of will made these films required viewing for any would-be science fiction writer or director. I could point out how each of the films' heroes (Robo, Quaid, and Rico) would find themselves right at home on Nazi recruiting posters. I could expound upon the films' central themes mirroring each other with the power and righteousness of the individual standing above the authority of government. I could, but as I say, I need to stop.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go watch Starship Troopers in the dark while crying. After all, it's Saturday.
I have such a crush on Michael Ironside. He's my favorite character actor ever.
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